“Wait… Am I Neurodivergent, Too?”—What to do when your child’s diagnosis makes you start questioning your own brain—and how therapy can help you navigate it
You Were Just Trying to Help Your Kid
You weren’t planning on having an identity crisis.
You just wanted to understand your child’s brain.
So you read the books.
Joined the groups.
Followed the therapists on Instagram.
Took the webinars.
And somewhere in all that research about autism, ADHD, and giftedness…
You started seeing yourself.
Not just little similarities.
But full-on “Wait… that’s literally me” moments.
Realizing You Might Be Neurodivergent as an Adult Is… A Lot
Maybe you’ve always felt “different.” Or “too much.” Or “too sensitive.”
Maybe you were the “gifted” kid who never learned how to rest.
Maybe you were the one who over-planned, over-functioned, over-apologized—and quietly unraveled.
This realization can feel like clarity and chaos at the same time.
Like freedom and grief.
Like finally seeing yourself… and not knowing what to do next.
You’re Not Alone (And You’re Not Broken)
Late-diagnosed neurodivergent adults are more common than people realize—especially those who’ve been:
Socialized as women
Raised in immigrant families
Managing trauma on top of masking
Operating in high-performance, high-expectation environments
If your child’s diagnosis turned the mirror on you, that doesn’t mean you “missed the signs.”
It means you were surviving.
And now, you get to thrive—on your terms.
Tips for Navigating a Late-Diagnosis or Self-Discovery
1. Name it without rushing to label it.
Whether you’re pursuing a formal diagnosis or just deep in self-recognition, give yourself space to notice, explore, and feel. There’s no rush. Identity is not a race—it’s a remembering.
2. Watch out for shame backlash.
You might think, “How did I miss this?” or “How many people did I mask for?”
This is common. Gently remind yourself: you coped the best you could with the tools you had. Now you’re building better ones.
3. Let yourself grieve.
Grief is part of clarity. You may mourn how long it took to understand yourself—or the ways your needs were never met. This is healthy. It means you’re honoring what was lost.
4. Expect your parenting to shift.
As you learn more about yourself, you’ll probably notice how your neurodivergence affects your parenting—both beautifully and challengingly. You’ll start to see overlaps. That’s not scary. It’s powerful.
5. You need support, too.
Your child deserves therapy.
And so do you.
Therapy Isn’t Just for Your Kid
At Sunburst Psychology, we work with neurodivergent adults—diagnosed or self-identified—who are coming to terms with their identity while raising children who are doing the same.
We offer:
Space to unpack your story without judgment
Support for regulating emotions that were never allowed to be “big”
Exploration of your own needs, not just your child’s
Guidance to shift from shame to self-understanding
A therapist who gets neurodivergence—and doesn’t need you to explain every part of it
You don’t have to navigate this alone.
You don’t have to be “sure” before you ask for help.
And you definitely don’t have to keep masking just to survive.
Looking for neurodivergent-affirming therapy in Seattle or Bellevue?
We’re here for the version of you that’s showing up now—curious, confused, a little overwhelmed, and ready to feel like yourself for the first time in a long time.
Book a consultation with Sunburst Psychology.
Let’s explore who you really are—with clarity, care, and zero pressure to be anyone else.
